Take Responsibility

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“Can you accept the notion that once you change your internal state, you don’t need the external world to provide you with a reason to feel joy, gratitude, appreciation, or any other elevated emotion?”

“The quantum field responds not to what we want; it responds to who we are being.”

—Dr. Joe Dispenza, Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself: How to Lose Your Mind and Create a New One



Note: When this article is published on, Sunday, December 3rd at 7:47 am, the moon and sun will be opposite astronomically and astrologically; it will be full moon in Gemini.

When I chose “Take Responsibility” as a guideline to live by, eleven months ago (see notes about BYY in previous blogs), I imagined I was agreeing to own my experience in all situations I came to be in. I was agreeing to communicate from that place of ownership in an empowered way. I was agreeing to use “I” language, not only as a means of communicating with and to others about my experience, but as a means of actually neuro-linguistically reminding myself that my experience is just that, mine. In choosing this, I get to shift from a state of blame in which I give my power away to an empowered state of being that keeps me at the center of my experience, and thus allows me to stay centered. This linguistic choice is also an energetic choice that is powerful and palpable, when I engage it!

When I chose this guideline, I also had a sense that it was about choosing to respond versus react—“responsibility” literally being the “ability to respond.” Instead of blame and reaction, and being unconscious like a reflex, I am opting for responding. This in combination with ownership holds the potential to open up the space in potentially heated situations, for choice, for peace and even for compassion.

So yes, taking responsibility is all those things. And I am still working on my skillfulness of those behaviors. But, when I re-read the quotes from Dr. Joe, I see an invitation to take “taking responsibility” to another level—a very existential and potent one. One that could allow me to cultivate my state of being so I can be an even more powerful and conscious co-creator of my life. It holds the potential to allow me to let others off the hook, as I remember and practice that I am responsible for my state of being.

I love the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza. Right now I am really engaged in studying and practicing his teachings. Since I started this blog on October 19th, one-and-a-half lunations ago, I have committed to doing a daily 45-minute meditation practice. On most days I am using Dr. Joe’s “Changing Beliefs and Perceptions” guided meditation. And, I have been walking and swimming in the river of change ever since! I am so excited and enthusiastic about this journey … this healing journey, this co-creative journey, this evolutionary journey, this transformational journey. It has stirred in me a deep longing to live the live I came to live. I am ready for my change! (See note below if you would like to join in a weekly community meditation in Santa Cruz).

As I was writing the first draft of this article, I was looking for a photo that would be a symbol of taking responsibility. I decided to include a photo of myself with my mother, Silver. She was here recently visiting for Thanksgiving. This photo is one of a joyful and harmonious moment between us, as we said our goodbyes at the airport. I love my mother, and she loves me. In the last few years, as she has embraced mortality, she always says and or writes “I will love you forever.” I am always moved by this and am grateful for her willingness to keep loving me beyond space and time. But when we are in space and time we have our challenges. In fact, she is one of my most potent mirrors, and I often get triggered and reactive when I am around her. And when I am with her, often, my intention to own my experience and respond and not react goes right out the window.

And of course I have learned many a belief and perception from her. But what I found as a powerful way to take responsibility, is to forgive my mother, my parents, and free myself from my past so I can grow into an empowered co-creator of a life and way of being that are in alignment with my values and vision. And that is what I am up to.

So last week when heard my Mom say something to the effect of: “And I can’t change,” I knew I was on track! Because in the last month of doing this work of changing my beliefs and perceptions I unearthed, and am consciously choosing to change, the belief that “People don’t and I can’t really change.” And that is huge, because if I don’t change that belief how can I really, truly transform. So now this subconscious belief can transform into, first, a conscious belief and choice to embrace the possibility that I can change and people do change. Then as I embody this belief and related states of being and behaviors that are in alignment with it, it can become a new subconscious belief. In this, I am taking responsibility for my state of being and allowing myself to truly change. And then without doubt, I can and do know, that, in fact, I am changing!


“ I forgive me, I forgive.
Everything that I’ve been holding onto, I let go.
I surrender, I surrender.
I’m ready for my change.”

—Tim McAfee-Lewis

Note: Contact me if you would like to meditate in community. I have organized a weekly Joe Dispenza Guided Meditation in Santa Cruz, CA. We meditate to one of Dr. Joe’s recorded guided meditation (currently “Changing Beliefs and Perceptions). Currently scheduled:

Wednesdays on December 6th and 13th, 2017
7:30-8:30 pm. (no one will be admitted after 7:40 pm)
Inner Light Ministries-Teen Room
5630 Soquel Drive
Soquel CA 95073
(Love offerings for Inner Light are welcome!)


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